Favours in a Fix

As usual, the overly-dramatic me, is in a fix on what favours to give for the big day.

Some of the suggestions I have in my mind are:
- Face Towels
- Pulut Kuning
- Chocolate (Specifically, Cowhead's Le Chocolatier Brand, Coffee Cocoa Flavour or )
- Candy (Which is like, I have a few already in my mind.)
- Biscuits ( Specifically, Deka Wafer Roll, Choco Flavour)
- Hand-made Crayons or Candles
- Teabags
- Honey in Straws
(Will probably continue this list when I get more ideas.)

My parents (my mum especially) doesn't mind me giving anything, but she just said that she wants me to give something edible. It's what my late grandmother would have suggested and she is insinuating that I should follow this too.

For me, I just want something within my budget. Packaging-wise, I would not mind to do it myself. It lends the personal touch which I JUST LOVE TO DO! Heh.

So, insha Allah, the plans to survey these items will start end of this year or early next year 'cos I think there will still be ample time to do so. (Also 'cos I plan to buy during the festive seasons when the items are considerably cheaper. HEH.)

Oh ya, so what are other options I should check up on for wedding favours?

Do share in the comments!

Thank you! ;)

So.. What Next?

Assalammualaikum to all!

As shared in the last post, I will share on the process I went through to choose and confirm with my vendors.

Just to update, I have confirmed the following:
- Wedding Deco                               } Cahaya Nanie Wedding Services
- Catering                                          } Cahaya Nanie Wedding Services
- DJ & Entertainment                       } Asry Sound Production under Cahaya Nanie Wedding Services
- Bridal House                                  } Sanggar Mustika
- Photography                                   } Sanbyoshi

And that is essentially all the important things for the wedding all done!

Nyeheheh!

Just left with hantaran, wedding cards and favours, which will be done next year.

So back to how I chose my vendors, I have to say that Mr Google is my saviour.

Firstly I started by joining a bridal forum under CozyCot which I had googled up, followed by asking my married friends/cousins on their experience and suggestions, before, (again) I googled for reviews on the suggestions given and also stalking their IG or FB profiles/pages. I would then proceed to ask for a quote should I feel satisfied enough that the vendor is up to my preference.

I felt totally badass, especially for the stalking around, but I felt that it was necessary. 'Cos with all the nightmare stories that we read of; of couples being cheated on by their vendors and left with the aftermath of a disaster, it was better to be safe than sorry.

So yeaaahh... back to the story,

I received advice that for a wedding, it depends on the preference of the couple on which aspects they want more emphasise for and thus, spend more on that. For me, I emphasised on the food and bridal, 'cos I know my parents would want to focus on that and for the bridal, I believe that I deserve at least just one day to look the best I can. (And it has always been one of my wishes for my own wedding. ;)) Also, I did not choose to have a full wedding package as I believe that it is better to break down the tasks for the vendors so that if anything bad or unexpected ever happens, it is easier to find a replacement.

My first criteria for food (ie: catering) is that the food is good, and best if they provide deco as well.
A few of my choices are:
- Amani Weddings
- SMR Wedding Services
- Puteri Wedding Services

My ex-tutee for Amani Weddings is the niece of the boss. She keeps on insisting I take up their packages but, it is too above-my-budget. Furthermore, I was not really comfortable as their mak andam is a pak andam and although I can request for a lady, it will be extra charges incurred.

For SMR Wedding Services, their wedding deco just did not appeal to me, so, NEXT!

Lastly, Puteri Wedding Services, I LOVE their food! 'Cos well, my aunt took them up when she got married more than a decade ago and the food is still as AWESOME.

But, for all three vendors above, I know of their reputation and the price that goes with them, and well, with my intention to keep it as affordable as possible, I decided to just find other vendors. That is when my fiance' told me to check out Cahaya Nanie Wedding Services, Farah Diana Catering & Wedding Services or Nizera Weddings. This is 'cos, the family behind Nizera Weddings is his friend's family (which my fiance' did say he will engage them for the wedding, but no confirmation as yet.. HEH) and he knows them well, and.. the other two companies are also related to his friend, so, upon hearing that, I checked them out again on FB and fell in love with Cahaya Nanie.

What caught my eye was their fairytale princess carriage dais, so I checked out their prices (honestly, very affordable! =P) and the one feature which they shared on their posters which sealed the deal was this: 'Price is inclusive of 4 standing fans.'

And why do u think this was important to me?
'Cos my mum has a severe allergy. She can't get too sweaty or eat seafood such as prawns and also, cant eat chicken. So I either have to book a CC with air-con facilities or get alot of fans. & since, I am on the bid to save as much money as possible, so fans would have to make do. & I have noticed a couple of times how some majlis are grand and pretty, but lack ventilation or any fans, so for the comfort of my guests and especially, my mum, fans are a priority.

[So, for wedding deco vendors, do take note of this. Probably have to highlight whether you provide fans at a reasonable price or inclusive of the package. I bet many more are concerned about this, but probably overlook it. Heh.]

With Cahaya Nanie Wedding Services, alhamdulillah, many items are included in the Exclusive package for a very reasonable price. I got my deco, catering, room deco, pulut pahar, sireh dara, candy corner or wedding cake, 1 live station plus DJ! (& i personally like the DJ 'cos he is also fiance's friend and I ever heard him live and was impressed on how he kept the mood going on and interacted well with the family. ;))

**PSST! I have to break this post into two as it is SUPER-LONG! Look forward to the next post, guys! ;))

Rapid Developments

Assalammualaikum and hello peeps!

Yes, yes.. I know I have not been posting much. Simply 'cos things seem to be in such a whirlwind. Right from the moment when we decided to apply for the BTO flat.

E and me had thought to take it slow and steady since we had planned to get married in 2-3 years' time.
But well, things took a drastic turn.

Okay, okay. Let me start from the beginning, ya.

Our marriage preparations were supposedly to be just mere planning, surveying of vendors and of course the savings to pay for our wedding itself.

I first started by listing out the key aspects of a basic Malay/Muslim wedding. I had wanted to be as simple as possible (ie: solemnization, dinner, just one bridal outfit, combined wedding venue, dowry as accordance to shariah, no DJ, khatam Quran, minimal exchange of gifts), but, my parents had stated that as the eldest, I was the one to set the standard. *SIGHS*

We had several arguments but in the end I relented. I did so because when I calmed down, I had a self-reflection and reminded myself that I am left with just a few years with my family and after that I will be going on a new journey as a wife. And I know, I should cherish the time left with my family before that journey starts.

So, I told my parents, "Okay, I will compromise." & I planned for my wedding to fit the barest minimum of my parents' expectations without being too frivolous, and alhamdulillah, they agreed! =)

My parents' expectations are actually, not that bad (after all the INTENSE discussions we had prior to getting engaged) 'cos they know how stubborn I can be when I am dead set on something. And this something is VERY IMPORTANT! It's the beginning of a whole new journey for me, insha Allah!

Their expectations are:
- separate wedding venue
- minimum 3 bridal outfits
- minimum 5 gifts to be exchanged

& my parents let me decide on ALL my VENDORS! WOOHOO!

Anyway, this is my list according to my preference:
- Bridal (Make-Up, Henna & Outfit - I love Henna, so yes, I am including this in! & Outfit refers to the dress, shoes, hijab, accessories and bouquet too..)
- Catering & Decoration (I prefer a vendor that does both, this is to prevent any miscommunication between two separate vendors. Oh, if you peeps wonder about wedding cake, it falls under here.)
- Photographer (I do not have a videographer simply because I prefer not to have one. HEH!)
- Wedding Favours
- Hantaran (Gifts for Exchange)
- Wedding Card
- Entertainment (Be it DJ or Kompang or Tarian or anything else in between..)
- **Preparations for Family and Bridesmaid(s) (Ie: Cloths/Clothes for my family and bridesmaid(s) or corsages - This is totally optional 'cos some families insist on the bride/groom to provide this while some others do it out of their own preference. For me, this is still a point for me to discuss with E 'cos I tend to overthink on this as I always want to make others happy without thinking about myself. HEH.)

Hmm.. I think that should be about all..
Am I missing anything? If I do, then probably 'cos I don't find it important.

Do remember, for your wedding, follow what you want. Not what is expected of you by other people. Especially if it entails money that you do not have. Again, wedding is just for a day while a marriage is forever, insha Allah ameen. Better to prepare for your forever instead of your temporary. (If you still do not understand this, can always ask me. =P)

So, the drastic turn that happened was when I was surveying bridal vendors. Wanna know what happened? Wait for the next post. I will stop here now, 'cos I tend to drag out the post.

In the next post, I will share on my process of choosing and confirming the different vendors and probably a few tips or recommendations that I got in the process too.

Till then,

Wassalam.

Next, BTO?

Never had I expected for things to go so fast between me and E!

Alhamdulillah, we have managed to get a house at the place where we feel is the best location for the both of us. =)

It was something both of us didn't actually plan 'cos both of us actually just wanted to live over at E's place after marriage and once our finances are stable, then we would get a house. But the opportunity was too good not to be missed.

The location was the prime reason why I relented to actually apply. It will be at West Crest @ Bukit Batok, near Millennia Institute. I loved the location 'cos its near to both our parents' homes, still within walking distance of about 15 minutes to the nearest MRT station, very accessible to various amenities such as, polyclinic, mosque, food centres,expressways, gas station, etc!

When we applied, my parents weren't even aware about it as they had once tried talking to me about getting a house but I was adamant that I would not be buying a house anytime soon, so when I dropped the bomb that I had applied, my mum was happy (in her own weird way of being sarcastic to me... -_-). AHAHAH!

Me and E just had a short discussion about the house, like... What type of house do we NEED and whether our expenses is enough to pay for the house..

So, alhamdulillah, with whatever we had saved, and with guidance from E's brother and relatives and after I read through all that I need to know at HDB's website, we took the plunge.

It was a nerve-wrecking period of about a month to wait for the news, and yesterday we finally got it! =)

Now, comes the headache. To start saving for both house and wedding!

Reflections of 08.02.14

Waking up on 08.02.14, my only thoughts were:

"Please let today's plan run smoothly and please, let time pass us by fast!"

Why?

'Cos I was a nervous wreck and I was totally exhausted. Same for my family too. We had been up till 2am in the morning to finish cleaning up. And still, it was not completed.

Tip #1: NEVER EVER think that you can clean up the whole house (especially mine) at the last minute. 'Cos that is just a recipe for a DISASTER!

So, anyways, I just helped with what I could, while my family members finished up with whatever that is left. I still had one more dulang to do and alhamdulillah, my besties came over to my rescue! Heh!

Actually, they had come over to help me with the bunga rampai, but most importantly, they helped me to calm down when I know that inside me, I was ready to BURST!

*THANK YOU SYAZ AND FINA!! <3 <3 <3 YOU GUYS SOOO MUCH!*

PS: In the midst of all the cleaning, please remember to also check whether all the fans, lights, air-conditioner, everything is working in tip-top condition!

(Apologies to those who were affected by this.. Really sorry!!)

Tip #2: Always call your caterer and arrange for them to come at least an hour before the event starts.

Why? My caterer came late! They came after the guy's side had arrived. Alhamdulillah, they were able to set up outside the house whilst the event was going on.

Tip #3: Just relax, enjoy, take loads of photos, mingle around with guests! Do all these 'cos the event is only about 3 hours long, so as long as nothing majorly bad happens, do enjoy yourself! Time will fly past and the next thing you know, everyone has left and only your family is there with you to help you clean up.. HEH!

<3 <3 <3

So anyways, to satisfy those who were curious to see the photos of my engagement, below are just some of them! Didn't want to flood this post with all my photos.. Hee!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Magic Date: 08.02.2014

The Coveted Bling-bling!

With all the gifts arranged beautifully..

With both sides of the family arriving!

(PSST.. that is just one side of Erwin's family..)

Finally, the moment all ladies to be engaged are waiting for!

Erwin's Lady Cousins Only..

And Erwin's Adorable Aunts..

Besties: Syaz & Fina

Poly-Mates: Nazreen

Dearest Confidante: Hana!

Bestest, Oldest Friends EVER: Naq, Anum, Syim & Jann!

My two Oldest Friends, since 5 and 4 years old respectively: Syim & Nad!

Two New Besties!! Inah & Teetee (She is also my MUA!)

Of course, not forgetting my aunt who has been one of the biggest help to me!

She helped me with the planning and the doing of most of the gift trays!

Plus, her cake is OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD!

My dad's side's cousins. Come to think of it, all of them are my step-cousins.. HAHA!

The lady in the middle, my religious class teacher.. Who has been there for me also since I was young.. Pictured here is her sister and her mum!

And yes, my mum just loves being in the photo! ;)

Not forgetting, the one responsible for the gorgeous photos! SUFYYYY!

The talented photographer! =D

And last but not least, a family photo!

And with the ticking of time, may this new journey as an engaged couple brings us more understanding with each other, love, patience and happiness, insha Allah!

Heart to Heart Talk with E's Family

So on 11th February, E and I finally met up after nearly 3 weeks of not doing so due to our busy preparations for the engagement. As usual, I would go to E's house after work (as his house is very near to my workplace) to do my Maghrib prayers before going out after that.

I was just settling down with a cup of syrup drink and keropok when E's father called E to sit down with me and to listen to him for awhile.

E's father started by congratulating us for smooth delivery of the engagement ceremony (Alhamdulillah! =D) but then he reminded us that being engaged is not the key to freedom - as in, it does not mean that now we are engaged, me and E can go out as we please, to do things that are against the teachings of Islam, ie engage in intimacy of any kind and to spend unneccessarily.

He reminded us again that an engagement is the period where a couple will face alot of challenges. Things that were never an issue between a couple could blow up into huge proportions thus affecting the relationship. He advised that the best thing to do whenever facing any problems is to sit down and talk. Lay out the problem, make sure both parties understand the situation and discuss possible solutions. He also reminded that whatever problems we have, it is okay to actually approach him or E's mother for advice.

He advised again that the period of two years will just fly if we do not make full use of the time we have now to prepare for our marriage. With that being said, one can never be fully prepared for marriage, but we still need to put in effort. He advised us to save more, do not spend unnecessarily, meet up only when needed, go for more classes on how to prepare ourselves for marriage (not just Kursus Perkahwinan ok. Because preparing for a marriage cannot be summarised in a class that lasts for two days..) and to upgrade ourselves, if we are able to, to go further at work.

I find that all the advice given is apt and much-needed for any BTBs or couples 'cos sometimes, we just forget about all the little things that matter when preparing for a wedding and will only regret later in life.

However, one thing mentioned by E's parents that really struck a chord within me was that they wish to see us last until Jannah, insha Allah! :'))

To hear from my future parents-in-law on their prayers for us, gave me some relief and hope that no matter what happens after this, I know that at least I still have the support of our families, insha Allah ameen.

One thing is for sure, for the next two years, may Allah s.w.t grant me patience to undergo the coming challenges, ameen!

An Honest Advice

"Some may ask why ur wedding so budget while others may ask why spend so much. Whatever it is, just answer truthfully.

To me, if its budget, that's what I can afford and more savings towards the house & honeymoon.

If its grand, that's to treat my families and friends for they have sacrificed so much and raised me well for years..

Point is, never succumbed to external pressures or ever be worried on what ppl gona think or say. What matters is you're happy, for this life & hereafter."

                                                                                                                         - Bro Za'im Nuriman

A wise and honest advice from my 2nd cousin. I do get tired from hearing others comment about a particular wedding - how GRAND it is or how cheapskate it is, but I feel sad for these people, (not the married couple) but those who comment. These people are the reason why most couples have to suffer, 'cos most parents are directly/indirectly influenced by these people. They might tell you, "You should spend within your own means.." but 5 mins later would be saying, "You know, that person's wedding was SO GRAND! It must cost about 30k. The food choices are MANY and VERY DELICIOUS!". 

-_- Contradicting much, right? :/

One thing I know for sure, for myself, I do not want to get into any major debts because of my wedding. I want a wedding that is blessed even for its simplicity. Best as possible, is to be moderate in spending 'cos I know, a wedding is just for one/two days, whereas a marriage is for a lifetime. And if a new journey as a married couple begins on a bad note of huge debts and financial problems, it would take alot of effort to keep that marriage going.

Anyways, before deciding to splurge, do take note whether are the things you wanna splurge on, isit essential? Are there any other alternatives with similar or better results? And also, plan early. At least, if anything unexpected happens, you can always find a replacement.

Hopefully I manage to send this message across to you BTBs, 'cos I wish the best for you in your marriage, the way that I want my own marriage to be, insha Allah ameen.. 

  

08.02.2014

IT'S OFFICIAL!

WE ARE FINALLY ENGAGED
ON 08.02.2014

More photos will be uploaded and there will be a recap for the event!

Stay tuned and assalammualaikum peeps!

=)

The Price of Marriage || Short Film || ثمن الزواج

Assalammualaikum and goodmorning peeps!

Just sharing with you a video that might leave an impact on us; especially since we might be going through the same exact thing as the man or even the lady. You might have seen this video on FB since it has been popping up on my newsfeed several times already, but well, I just wanna share to those who have not seen this!

Spare just 7 minutes to watch this video and reflect on it!

You know, after watching this, I kept on wondering whether did I bring inconvenience to E? My family and I did noy put a price for the dowry; E was the one who decided on it but I was worried that he chose the amount 'cos he thinks that the amount is what my family is expecting of him. I did ask E again yesterday, and he said that he chose it with sincerity, not because of any other reasons and he mentioned also, that money can always be earned, so I do not need to worry about all this. PHEW!

Alhamdulillah. =)

I do hope that whatever you guys are facing, just remember that the most important thing about marriage is not the wedding, but the marriage life. Look far into the future to decide your next course of action instead of just thinking of that one day. Yes, literally, just one day of happiness. And I SOO hope that parents would understand the situation that we, the youths, are facing now, instead of just following our desires. Wallahu'alam.

Anyways, I hope to post more in the near future!

Been soo bzzzz bzzzz busssyyy with all the preparations!

Alright, take care peeps! ;)

SURPRISE!

Saaaay...

Was it ever mentioned that I had kept the engagement a secret from families (extended) and friends?

HEE!

Yes! I had managed to hush up all the news regarding this engagement except for a select few who helped me for the 'merisik'..

Below is a pixelated copy of the invitation sent out to my closest friends on 1st January 2014! (Two were informed earlier, 'cos I met up with them! Hee.. You guys know who you are! *winks*) A simple invitation using AWESOME Android Mobile Apps: Instext and PicsArt!

To those who have been invited, I hope that you could grace the occasion and share my happiness on this day. For those who have not, it does not mean that you all are not in my mind.. All of my friends are, but, since it is a fairly small engagement ceremony, I have to take into consideration for my family too..

I hope that you all understand my position and that no misunderstanding would occur, instead, do shower us with prayers, ameen!

*twinklez*