Friday, February 21, 2014

Heart to Heart Talk with E's Family

So on 11th February, E and I finally met up after nearly 3 weeks of not doing so due to our busy preparations for the engagement. As usual, I would go to E's house after work (as his house is very near to my workplace) to do my Maghrib prayers before going out after that.

I was just settling down with a cup of syrup drink and keropok when E's father called E to sit down with me and to listen to him for awhile.

E's father started by congratulating us for smooth delivery of the engagement ceremony (Alhamdulillah! =D) but then he reminded us that being engaged is not the key to freedom - as in, it does not mean that now we are engaged, me and E can go out as we please, to do things that are against the teachings of Islam, ie engage in intimacy of any kind and to spend unneccessarily.

He reminded us again that an engagement is the period where a couple will face alot of challenges. Things that were never an issue between a couple could blow up into huge proportions thus affecting the relationship. He advised that the best thing to do whenever facing any problems is to sit down and talk. Lay out the problem, make sure both parties understand the situation and discuss possible solutions. He also reminded that whatever problems we have, it is okay to actually approach him or E's mother for advice.

He advised again that the period of two years will just fly if we do not make full use of the time we have now to prepare for our marriage. With that being said, one can never be fully prepared for marriage, but we still need to put in effort. He advised us to save more, do not spend unnecessarily, meet up only when needed, go for more classes on how to prepare ourselves for marriage (not just Kursus Perkahwinan ok. Because preparing for a marriage cannot be summarised in a class that lasts for two days..) and to upgrade ourselves, if we are able to, to go further at work.

I find that all the advice given is apt and much-needed for any BTBs or couples 'cos sometimes, we just forget about all the little things that matter when preparing for a wedding and will only regret later in life.

However, one thing mentioned by E's parents that really struck a chord within me was that they wish to see us last until Jannah, insha Allah! :'))

To hear from my future parents-in-law on their prayers for us, gave me some relief and hope that no matter what happens after this, I know that at least I still have the support of our families, insha Allah ameen.

One thing is for sure, for the next two years, may Allah s.w.t grant me patience to undergo the coming challenges, ameen!



Wednesday, February 19, 2014

An Honest Advice

"Some may ask why ur wedding so budget while others may ask why spend so much. Whatever it is, just answer truthfully.

To me, if its budget, that's what I can afford and more savings towards the house & honeymoon.

If its grand, that's to treat my families and friends for they have sacrificed so much and raised me well for years..

Point is, never succumbed to external pressures or ever be worried on what ppl gona think or say. What matters is you're happy, for this life & hereafter."

                                                                                                                         - Bro Za'im Nuriman

A wise and honest advice from my 2nd cousin. I do get tired from hearing others comment about a particular wedding - how GRAND it is or how cheapskate it is, but I feel sad for these people, (not the married couple) but those who comment. These people are the reason why most couples have to suffer, 'cos most parents are directly/indirectly influenced by these people. They might tell you, "You should spend within your own means.." but 5 mins later would be saying, "You know, that person's wedding was SO GRAND! It must cost about 30k. The food choices are MANY and VERY DELICIOUS!". 

-_- Contradicting much, right? :/

One thing I know for sure, for myself, I do not want to get into any major debts because of my wedding. I want a wedding that is blessed even for its simplicity. Best as possible, is to be moderate in spending 'cos I know, a wedding is just for one/two days, whereas a marriage is for a lifetime. And if a new journey as a married couple begins on a bad note of huge debts and financial problems, it would take alot of effort to keep that marriage going.

Anyways, before deciding to splurge, do take note whether are the things you wanna splurge on, isit essential? Are there any other alternatives with similar or better results? And also, plan early. At least, if anything unexpected happens, you can always find a replacement.

Hopefully I manage to send this message across to you BTBs, 'cos I wish the best for you in your marriage, the way that I want my own marriage to be, insha Allah ameen.. 

  


Monday, February 10, 2014

08.02.2014

IT'S OFFICIAL!

WE ARE FINALLY ENGAGED
ON 08.02.2014

More photos will be uploaded and there will be a recap for the event!

Stay tuned and assalammualaikum peeps!
=)